Now that it's been brought up, I really SHOULD be taking more protective measures. As it is, I just don't drink stuff that other people hand to me and I have Campus Safety's number. Maybe I'll stick a mini flashlight in my purse from now on, and I admit that I should probably get one of those rape whistles since I can't scream to save my life.

I've also had an informal police training in break-ins, sting operations, and arrests. Does that count? I didn't take that measure to avoid rape or assault, though.

I am a female. Usually I don't feel threatened on campus when I am alone but sometimes I get nervous. I tell my guy friends when I am going to be walking somewhere alone at night and usually ask one of them to walk with me. They are always happy to walk with me and they even get mad if I don't ask them and walk alone.

Zitat von mapleleaf

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Getting too involved in arguing about men being victims, too, shifts us away from the fact that rape is usually male sexual violence, or male sexual coercion, and that the targets on a campus are almost always female.

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Agreed.

Speaking of statistics, I want to bring up the fact that most rape is not the stereotypical stranger on the street at night, but acquaintance rape (I think it's something like 75% of all rapes are acquaintance rape); however, most of the responses here are about stranger rape. How about a discussion about dealing with a situation involving a friend or an acquaintance? (Nearly) every reply to this includes a comment about "walking alone at night" or something similar, but how many of you have planned for the possibility of being assaulted by someone you know?

I am a female. When I walk home from my girlfriend's dorm at night, I walk quickly and I'm automatically suspicious of other people, especially if they are alone. I consider this a defense mechanism, but it doesn't seem right that I have to be nervous (or afraid) of everyone. I actually feel safest when I walk between TKE and Beta, just because I'm sure all those guys are up (and there are often people sitting on the porch at night) and would help me if I needed it.

Zitat von Petrus

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[quote="mapleleaf"] How about a discussion about dealing with a situation involving a friend or an acquaintance?

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I think this is where the enthusiastic yes and no comes in. Of course is someone is determined to rape you giving or witholding your consent won't matter. But in the cases where rape can happen due to ambiguous consent it is important for us to ALWAYS set clear boundaries with our sexual partners or anyone we perceive as wanting to have a sexual relationship with us. Additionally, I think a lot of women and maybe some men as well are hesitant about saying no or setting boundaries because they don't want to offend or cause an awkward situation. This needs to change. You are the one who is most responsible for your body so speak up about what you want done to it. The people who are wroth having sexual encounters with will understand if you need to take it slow. You do not owe anything that you do not want to give, so be bold and clear and insistent because no one else can do it for you.

I don't think I should have to take 'measures' to stop myself from being raped, or I'm not even sure what that means. What I do is always remember that this is a small campus, and that we often forget that real things can happen in the Knox bubble. I communicate with my guy and girl friends about consent and always remind myself that just because people are my friends doesn't mean they're not capable of making a bad decision. Rather than trying to stop myself from getting raped, I think we should be reminding students to ask for consent and hold themselves accountable.

When I'm out, especially at night, I'm very aware of who I am and who is around me, especially if I see someone multiple times. In terms of preventing acquaintance rape, which is more common, there's not much you can do. I do keep a very close eye on my drinks, and I try not to go places alone. I also try to be vocal if there's something I'm uncomfortable with or uncomfortable doing when I'm in a sexual situation.

At present, no.

In the past, should I have? Yes -- I should not have gotten into car with stranger. In the end, the stranger's own possible feeling of affection for me was stronger than the stranger's own possible feeling of aggression against me, and I managed to get away without having to fight or get raped.

I say "possible" because I can only assume, but I really don't know what someone else is feeling. I assume a feeling of affection because I think the stranger liked me. I assume a feeling of aggression because the stranger did touch me in an unwanted sexual way.

(Referencing over to your "enthusiastic yes/no" question, you could say that it was an enthusiastic no. Think about that for a moment. An enthusiastic no. How does one practice enthusiasm and negativity at the same time? Here's one possibility: puking. I've come into contact with something that may have looked OK a moment ago (or I may not have looked at it closely enough). But now it's so unwanted, that I enthusiastically eject if from myself. Not in a positive orgasmic celebratory way, but not really in an aggressive manner. I wasn't jumping for joy, and I wasn't jumping for rage either. When I puke up booze, I'm not aggressively resisting or fighting against the booze. I'm getting rid of it, but I'm not "just" leaving it behind. It's an enthusiastic leave-behind.)

How did this come about? In high school, I hitch-hiked -- not cruising or running away, just getting to school cheaply -- and I got into the cars of both men and women I did not know. Luckily survived both.

Speaking of theater, it would be interesting to stage the incident in four driver/rider permutations: man/girl; man/boy; woman/girl; woman/boy. Could it be done all at once with two actors of indeterminate gender, where age is the only difference? David Bowie Sr and David Bowie Jr? Or does gender need to be clearly signaled, in order for audience to understand?